Amanda Bynes has boarded a one-way trip on the crazy train.

Ok I know I’m supposed to be writing about more in-depth subjects than what’s going on in celebrity wasteland… but I just can’t help myself with all this Amanda Bynes psychosis. It’s just so fascinating to watch these celebutantes spiral downward from wearing a princess tiara and being walking Sephora ads into being crackheads.

I thought it would be a tough challenge for anyone to slide into dumpsville with less grace and more scabs than Lindsay Lohan. Lindsay has been so downtrodden and everyone’s over it, so I skip over all the stories about her breaking her probation and re-admitting herself into rehab… because now it’s just boring to read. None of her behaviour is shocking anymore, so the interest factor is nill. Now I just feel sorry for her and legitimately wish she’d go back to the life she had before drugs. But Amanda Bynes… wow haha. I still think of her as that annoying little kid on All That from the mid 90s. It’s hard to place her as an erratic felon.

I know I’m speaking the obvious… but why bother going on Twitter tirades to defend your purity? The random attacks against other celebrities that seem to be unprovoked, the scabs all over her face, the mostly-naked photos posted when you know the entire world is watching you, the countless misdemeanors for driving (hitting a cop? Seriously, what the fuck?), the indescribable polyanna wigs… the erratic behaviour, the public appearance, the need to get a bad weave and dye your eyebrows black and pierce your cheek…? Well, none of that points to normal behaviour.

And every time she launches some attack on someone, she immediately takes it down and then chalks it up to a hacker invading her account. Dude, if you have a hacker and you’re upset by all the alleged faux posts… and you’re in enough trouble as it is… DELETE YOUR ACCOUNT. Maintain some kind of integrity. I think if it was me, and I was getting sick of the media, I’d just erase the god damn thing and heed some advice from my PR rep. And take a long vacation to some unheard of place in the world to drink lemon water, eat aloe-infused tofu and “find myself”.

The thing that disgusted me the most (even though I know it’s crack talk) is when she was defending herself on Twitter against the NYPD by throwing out the fact that she’s a “multi-millionaire”. haha REALLY!? What an awesome way to get the public to take you seriously when you think everyone is supposed to believe you and take your threats with even a grain of seriousness, when you BRAG about how much money you have. Money can’t buy brains, idiot.

Even though I always thought she was an annoying actress, nobody can deny that she was gorgeous… and teens seemed to love her. Hell, even I watched What I Like About You. It’s just… weird to see this person who’s always played such puritan roles ending up as a street mutt. I mean, even though all the Lohan stuff was shocking at first, it wasn’t really surprising because she was a sex symbol before she was even legal… so it made more sense than Amanda Bynes becoming like that. She was never a sex icon. Up until all this she still looked like a teen princess. It doesn’t fit.

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