I should probably just give up on Plenty of Fish. Aye carumba. I was talking to one guy through e-mail for a while who seemed cool, but then he just stopped e-mailing me. I figured ok, whatever… and then I found a guy who seemed like Mr. Perfect. He was pretty much exactly what I like in a man. Physically he was insanely attractive. The second I saw his profile my jaw dropped, and I kept going back to his profile, so I figured… why not go crazy and add him to my favourites? I never do that, but I couldn’t resist. I saw him look at my profile, but he never sent me a message… so then I really went bonkers and I sent the first message (which I REALLY never do), and to my absolute delight he responded and we’ve been talking ever since.
Well. We made the mistake of moving our inbox conversations to the world of texting. Man, it was so fucking awkward. At first it was fine, but I kind of got the impression he was making some snide remarks to me… and I didn’t know if it was safe to assume he was actually being rude, since texts can be so ambiguous, so I just ignored it. Then he kept kind of self-doubting over the things he was saying, telling me he hoped he wasn’t coming off as too rude, and he wanted to know how he was coming across to me… so I just told him that as far as I was concerned, it’s next to impossible to analyze a person that way, and that he was fine. However, I think he’s the type to second guess himself and he’s either really self-conscious or he’s paranoid… because he kept misinterpreting everything I was saying and it was getting me flustered. Here I thought I was talking to this cool, confident, down-to-earth guy, and then I come to find out he’s sort of the opposite… but I was still interested.
So he sends me a message saying that his thumb was getting sore from texting and “no offence” to me, so I said ok, go do your thing then and we can talk some other time. He asks when he can text me again, so I said, “Any time you want :)” and he goes, “Any time you want, I like those words haha”. And I didn’t really know what to say in response, so I said something like, “Yeah, they can be enticing at times.” So he leaves, and then about a half hour later or so he texts me again and says he’s in the mood to text again, and do I mind? I said no of course not. The first thing he asks me is if I live alone, so I say yes… and then he jumps to another topic about how he went out to Harvey’s to get something to eat and so I said, “Oh yeah haha. How is that?” and he said, “Good. Just missing one thing.” So me, making uncomfortable smalltalk, said, “What’s that? Fries?” And he says, “Dessert.”
Ok, seriously… how would any of you take that? I know how I took it. I was in an uncomfortable situation, so all I said was “uh huh lol”. He said, “You don’t talk much. Why’s that?” So I waited a minute before saying, “Well I could be wrong, but I get the impression that this is veering more towards sexting than texting.” BOOM. Instant awkwardness that set the tone for the rest of our conversation, and which I’m pretty sure ended our communication all-together haha. I was kind of astounded when we stopped talking, and I spotted Meghan online so I was talking to her about it because god knows she’s had some real prizes on that site too. She completely agreed that I said nothing wrong in our entire conversation and suggested I give it a day. But you know what? I shouldn’t have to apologize for jumping to that assumption, because there are enough slimey creeps out there who WOULD be that way, and I know because they always seem to find me. And it’s quite understandable how I would interpret that to be what was going on, based on the things he was saying. So then he’s like, “Omg fuck, see this is why I hate this. This is not going the way I wanted it to :(. As if you would think that.” and so me being the nice girl that I am, I tried to apologize and say “Oh no, I just misunderstood. It’s ok, it happens” type of thing. So that was very awkward, but I thought we had gotten past it.
So after that I tried to break the ever-thickening ice by saying, “Now see, maybe if we say enough stupid things to each other that we can laugh about, there won’t be any awkwardness if/when we meet.” WELL. First of all, he took that as me trying to tell him he was saying anything stupid to me at all, and then I had to packpedal and tell him I was referring to myself. Then he got all hung up on the fact that I said “if/when” instead of “when”, and went, “If/when we meet? haha wow this is not going good at all.” And I was like what the…? We’ve only been talking off and on for a couple weeks! And not even every day… and the e-mails we had exchanged were so brief, that it’s not like we’ve been talking in depth at all. How do you rectify that? How does one keep explaining themselves when there’s nothing to explain? Then I tried to say something else and he basically just brushed me off by saying “Well this whole conversation just took a very awkward twist. Have a good night, I’ll let you go.” And all I could say to that was “…Ok? You too.” I had thought about sending a message to the tune of, “I don’t understand what just happened, but I’d like to still keep in touch.” But I thought… nope. I won’t be that girl. He’s a big boy; he can figure it out. And if he’s going to be like that, well it’s no loss for me.
I don’t understand this at all, because we had JUST been having a conversation about how you can’t read too much in to things a person says through texts or e-mails until you know them in person, because… it’s not possible to decipher. And then he ended up judging me for things I wasn’t even implying in the first place, putting me in a real uncomfortable position. So I’m assuming that our tentative date that we were discussing for next week won’t be happening haha. I thought if anyone was going to be crazy analytical, it’d be me. I mean, I am the woman afterall… but he beat me to it.
Where are all the normal guys? Another really cute one just added me to his favourites, and I have a cool guy talking to me from the Essex area. But seriously? Now I remember why I hated dating so much when I was doing it more regularly.