Friend drama put me in an awkward place after this weekend. All in all I tend to be drama-free. I rarely have issues with my friends, unless of course they’re the type to pick arguments (I have one of those, as I’m sure you’ve been able to deduce from prior entries). So I don’t know how I seem to get involved in intense ordeals which leave me in a position to be punished when I don’t deserve it.
I avoid people who attract negative attention and the aforementioned “drama”, so it’s no surprise that it’s these very individuals who cause these issues in the first place. Usually I avoid communicating with them, and in some circumstances I just erase them from my life. But I’m far too nice of a person to say no when one of them wants to be included… barring what I know they’re like. One of them got invited this past weekend to spend time with us here in my hometown, as my two best friends from out of town were coming down. So it was the four of us.
Now, my best friends have the link to this blog, and they know writing is my cartharsis, so they should know that if I’ll air my grievances anywhere, it’ll be here. And that’s precisely what I would like to do.
#1 – My friends like to get dressed up and go to nice places, and they messaged me telling me they were brining some fancy clothes with them. So, I made reservations at the fanciest place in town JUST to go and have some drinks. It was a beautiful night and the place is on the 14th floor of a downtown building with an excellent view of the water and of town. But all I heard were complaints of how dead it was and how we needed to leave and go somewhere more exciting. I made a point of bringing this up to them, so it’s not like what I’m saying comes as a surprise. But it upset me that I tried to do something they’d enjoy and they carelessly complained about it right in front of me, not realizing that they were insulting their host. That was the first problem.
#2 – One of my friends had a little too much booze in his system and was carrying on rather boisterously on the patio, in front of a handful of people who were just trying to mind their own business. I hate when people attract attention. I don’t like being centred out, or embarassed. And he was doing both. When one of my other friends tried to tell him to be quiet, he got even louder, saying, “Well I’m paying $9 for each drink, so I have the right to talk however loudly I want. Has anyone complained yet? No. So when someone says something, then I’ll tone it down, but until then I’ll speak however I want.” I don’t agree with any of this at all. You CHOSE to pay $9 for a martini. Nobody forced your hand in to it. You could have just come along, and if you had a problem with the price you were paying, you could have sat there and smoked your cigarettes and let us enjoy our night humiliation-free. But because your own choices played a role in the evening, we shouldn’t have to pay for it.
#3 – He’s opinionated and stops at nothing to share what he’s thinking. I don’t think he exactly lives by the “pick your battles” motto. He certainly did pick his battles, though, which is what ended the night. We got kicked out of the bar, and as a matter of fact off the property, because he decided to let his big mouth flap at some kid who was equally good at the opinionated thing as he was. I don’t know what they were arguing about, but I do remember him sqawking all night about everything, so I don’t believe that he was a victim of the fight he got in to. He said he was threatened, and maybe he was. Actually, he PROBABLY was. But it’s not like he hasn’t made threats when he’s argued before. Nonetheless, he came back to my place crying and whining about how nobody stuck up for him.
#4 – He got into an argument at my apartment with one of my other friends… and then because of the shit-slinging going on, I got into an argument with our other friend, who promptly stuffed her belongings under her arm and stormed out thinking she was going to drive back home two hours away hammered. I had to phone her and sweet-talk her so I could tell her to come back; I caught her in time, because she was just about to come up to the highway on-ramp.
Seriously? That’s the last time I invite people down and organize a night for them.